


The Divine Feminine

by spanishdandy



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fashion & Models, Anorexia, Body Paint, F/F, F/M, Family Issues, M/M, Painting, Writing on Skin, skin wars, the divine feminine
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-04-17 03:48:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14179893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spanishdandy/pseuds/spanishdandy
Summary: It's so frustrating as a body painter not to tell your model they're beautiful. Maybe those kinds of things are better left unsaid. Especially when Rafael can show it just fine.This work was titled after Mac Miller's album "The Divine Feminine"The chapters are after songs on this album.R.I.P. Mac





	1. My Favorite Part

The models come into the room with smiles on their faces. Rafael was confident Carmen used his description to find a model just right. He hadn’t done a simple project like this in a while. They both knew these weren’t the best clients to work for. He noted that the moment they met. “Cool model, promotional design, fine day,” was the formula to working through it.

the fact Olivia got comfortable with her models. One being the jewel that was Amanda Rollins. The work they women did together was always extravagant. He almost wanted to cry at how easy getting through three looks would be. Amanda’s body with such great technique applied- they were unstoppable. 

“I never would've guessed.” he teased. 

Liv hugged Amanda over her robe and rolled her eyes. “Oh c’mon. My design was made for Amanda.” 

“They’re always made for Amanda!” countered Rafael, letting her playfully punch him in the arm. 

Rafael turns back  around to the producers completely forgetting he had his own canvas to paint on. 

Sonny is nervous without a doubt. He’s about to get painted on by his idol. So much might go wrong,   but the experience would be great. Carmen assured Sonny of the fact Rafael had dealt with all different body types. Recovering anorexic wasn't one of them. “ _ Shit,”  _ was the only thing he could think the whole time he awaited Rafael’s reaction. 

It wasn’t too good. 

Rafael took a long look at the lanky boyish figure feet away from him. Staring at a person wasn’t kind, but that is the job. Still, Dominick had manners, and that’s what mattered. They shook hands but Sonny had no time to introduce himself before  the artist called the producer and artistic director over to him. The blonde woman put a hand up to stop Rafael’s obvious observation from leaving his mouth. “Now I think it was a big decision on our part to bring in a unique model.” She babbled, trying not to be rude. 

“You left that out of the email, but that wasn’t what I wanted to ask you.” 

“Oh?! Then what was it?”

“It’s more of an enhancement, you see. I hadn’t worked this  _ into _ our vision for this concept- this picture.” He stammered. There was nothing wrong with the Sonny’s body. He’s always open with his models about how appreciated they are. Maybe that was why Sonny felt a pit in his stomach.

At this point everyone, including Amanda and Olivia were staring. Not because he knowingly had two great pieces of art posing for the show. This shouldn’t make any difference though. For Rafael, a few changes weren’t a problem.  _ 110 percent, like always. _

“That’s fine. Forget I said anything. Let’s start.” He said, wishing to hear no more of the seemingly clueless woman paying him.

Unfortunately, Sonny’s mood had taken a dive. What’s worse than coming in ready to model and having this great artist not want to work on him.

It’s always so sad when your idol turns out to be an asshole. This same guy will paint his body for hours.  _ Holy crap, Rafael Barba will paint me for hours... _

During Olivia’s break she lends a little advice before Rafael starts. Pulling him aside she whispers “Please, don’t freak yourself out over this. If you ask me, he looks just like the sketch. Paint based off of that like you always do. You’ll do fine.”

Rafael shrugged it off. They worked together on the design. It’s a flawless layout. He was just so overly sensitive about getting close to someone else’s issue. Yet he prepared and worked like this the whole time.

They sat together and talked through the design as thought their meeting hadn’t gone the way it did. The way Rafael described all the details going into Sonny’s look was mesmerizing. He instantly forgot the insensitively blunt statements the artist said earlier. It was when Rafael told Sonny to take off his robe he shivered. It was July 14th in Manhattan. 

Cold wasn’t the problem. 

Everyone always looked at him like this flexible model people would play with. He was genuinely okay about being skinnier than most men that come to mind when you think “Model.” They also said things like “that was his edge.”

But Rafael getting flustered and nervous by his appearance was awkward. Honestly, I didn’t seem like such a big deal when signing up but being there acted as an eye opener. He kept his mouth shut and took the robe off, handing it to Carmen. 

Getting the base on is easy. Rafael can get a feel for the structure of his models body.  Sonny hated this stage most. The back is his favorite part. With the information he holds it’s easy to appreciate the feminine curve of his spine. It’s one he wouldn’t have gotten to glide his tool on with someone unlike Sonny. He encountered this a lot while working his canvas. 

_ The little things, I guess? _

As Rafael brought out the gold stones to be placed along the spine, he took another look at his sketch. Olivia  _ is _ right. It could’ve been a coincidence but the figure Rafael drew resembled that of Sonny’s. That went a long way in changing his attitude. They worked like they’d been together for a lifetime. Within the two hours they had Olivia was pleasantly surprised by how well they’d gotten along together . She didn’t have to stop yet another of Rafael’s breakdowns. 

Sonny posed like a professional model too. He put up with the occasional inside joke between Rafael and Olivia. The constant re-adjusting to fit the camera angle. The useless comparisons between his and Amanda’s body. It was all in good nature since everything relied on technique and aesthetic to them. Both models expressed that in a wickedly sensual way with their innocent poses and forms

He couldn’t have been happier. There were so many moments allowing Rafael’s hands move him around so comfortably that made him nearly squeal “Thank you,” like he was drawing in his dorm room again. Sonny didn’t have to be the Rafael's “sad trans fan” anymore.

As he stood back to look at the monitor before the final picture. It’s stunning. having no time to admire what he’d done, they work on the second set.

The pictures turned out amazing. Both artists were so careful in checking so it’s all lined up on the monitor. The both silently enjoyed creating two more looks with each other. Sonny definitely loosened up to talk more. Rafael felt it only polite to respond. He loved being so proud of the his own work and accomplishments in his creation. But on Sonny’s body he couldn’t expect a better outcome.

Wrapping up after a great session was always calming. Despite his seamless formula, the day was hectic. 

Everybody shook hands and filed out the room, leaving just the artists and Models in the room.  All cleaned up and dressed, Sonny and Amanda are eventually helping clean up painting supplies and stencils. 

“You did a great job today.” Rafael complimented. 

"You think? It was the first time in a while I felt out of place in a project." Sonny responded, shaking his head. 

**_Oh god. I did that._ **


	2. Skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rafael and Sonny meet again when Sonny is unsure about taking a new job.

Sonny sat at his computer and scrolled through his email. He wasn’t focused enough on the details as he and Amanda were having the best conversation. The shoot they’d both done four months before has done well and made him popular. Well enough to feed Sonny and pay his agent for months. One meant more than the other. The whole time he was under the impression Rafael and Olivia were in the spotlight.

“They love you.” She cheered.

He chuckled in confusion. Love seemed like a strong word he couldn’t find many people using. At Least not regarding himself. “What?”

“Well, most  people are talking about the promotional ties but you seem to be their focus.” She clarified. That might not have been the best response.

This phone call was taking a turn for the worse. There was only one thing so interesting about him. His bones. The picture featured him in front of a white background, with red and gold swirls resting on his skin. It allowed for people to see how much he still struggled.

His mood darkened, Sonny sucked in what little he had out. “What do they like so much about me?” He asked, holding his breath for the answer. That of which he already knew. Amanda freezes on the other end. How could she muster up a better reason from the media than “you’re so fucking skinny.” There was none. Her silence spoke dreadful words. To be someones “thinspo” wasn’t one of his desires.

“Could I call you back later?”

“Actually,” Amanda started. “There’s this new body painting show in the works. It needs male models.”

Sonny thought about it for a moment. As Amanda rambled on about why it would be such a great opportunity for him he thought of a reason to decline. Many good excuses came to mind, but all that came out was “I can’t.”

There was a lot of back and forth after that, but Sonny was relieved to stop the argument with a no. Except it didn’t end there.

Amanda had switched to a more serious tone towards Sonny. There was a real determination in her to hear  “yes.” He wondered why but didn’t feel like asking.

“What happens when our agent asks you to do it? You give up all that money because you’re 30 lbs skinnier than the other models?”

“No!”

“Then what? You have done nothing in Four Months. I know the reaction you got today might overwhelm but this is what you said you wanted out of modeling.” She pushed. It pained him to say it worked. Sonny was so tired of fighting over something he wasn’t even sure about, he gave in to her offer. _I said lots of bull when I weighed nothing._

“Come over. I’ll send you my address.”

* * *

 

Not much later he hears a delicate knock on the door. The plan was to get insight on what was so special about the show. Why she almost bullied Sonny into doing it. While he waited it became a mission to avoid his social media, afraid he’d read schoolyard taunts that went on for miles. Old habits were enough to kill him slowly.

“It’s open.” He called.

The door opened, and to his surprise, there were two people at standing there. Someone he hadn’t seen since their bittersweet work interaction. Sonny never forgot about that, and neither did Rafael.

Amanda seemed to be tied to everything Rafael did. They weren’t even friends. He never expected to see or work with Sonny again because of his unprofessional demeanor. The artist would’ve refused to come along if Sonny had been mentioned. Not because he didn’t want to.

They stayed polite with each other. Sonny had a smile that lifted the awkwardness of the situation even though he was annoyed by the inconvenience too.

The model welcomed the two in with tipsy arms. It didn’t matter what Amanda was thinking bringing his muse to such a sad little apartment. “Sorry, I told him he could join since he’ll be working on this with us. ”

He raised an eyebrow. What had he gotten himself into?

“You’re just everywhere, Aren’t you?” He joked. Rafael smirked at the remark. It was true. He always ended up where he wanted to be.

Behind them Amanda is seen searching for something on her person. “Shit, I left my phone in the car. Wait one second and then we can get started.” She sighed. Her leaving the room caused a near panic attack from Sonny. Tonight would be long and stressful. The first trial being: curiosity.

Sonny rolled his eyes and walked over to the counter where Rafael sat on the stool. There was a sketch book in his hands.  “She’s something else isn’t she?”

“Yeah, She is. But-” _Here it comes_.

“She told me something interesting. I don’t think it was any of my business-”

“That’s fine. I can tell you whatever you wanna know before she walks back in here.”

Rafael thought for a second about which questions where appropriate, which were meaningless. He asked why Sonny was so reluctant to join the show. “Because when I posed for you I weighed 119 pounds. I tell everybody I got healthy ten years ago, but I weigh less than that now. Nobody wants to work with that.” He cautioned. Rafael had no idea what to say. He thoroughly enjoyed working on Sonny. The only issue was his learning curve. “Trust me. The painters I’m working with will adore you as much as I did.”

In that moment Sonny had to try his hardest not to over react. All artists said these kinds of things to models they wanted to work with. But he was _Rafael_. Someone he wanted to be for the longest time. That was the only to make his words count for something. He asks Rafael what he’s drawing. It seems detailed and interesting.

“You.” He responded. “I’m making sketches for things I might wanna do, and you’re just  in front of me.”

Sonny blushed. Curious to see what things were drawn on him, he walked to the counter and looked over into the book. Rafael pulled it close to his chest and looked up at Sonny, who was barely inches away. They kiss, yes. It was brief and Sonny would later describe it as “fun” to Amanda.

_There it is again. His smile._

Amanda walks in noticing a moment happened while she was gone. “Did I miss something? Neither of you ever smile like that.” She joked.

“So tell me more about this show of yours.”

* * *

 

Rafael leaves after an hour of talking. The whole night became very flirty for him and Sonny, so they exchange numbers to continue on their own. He calls an Uber, which leaves Sonny and Amanda.

“Was that what I thought it was earlier?” She asks. Sonny knew this was coming, so he confirmed their relation without a second thought.

Amanda squealed and hugged Sonny over the counter. “I guess it was a good idea to bring him! You never told me you were gay though.”

“Was that a question? Because if so, I’m not.” He said.

“Bi?”

“That’s a little more complicated. You wouldn’t get it.”

Being as determined as she was, Amanda sat straight up in her seat and looked Sonny in the eye.

“Try me.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think about this chapter! The next one will be published later in the week so don't expect it tomorrow. I'm really sorry about that!


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